FrightFest 2025 Review: 213 BONES is a Blunt and Rusty Slasher

The title may sound rather random, but 213 bones is the total amount of bones in the adult human skeleton – some theorise it is actually anywhere between 206 – 214, but that’s a bone of contention we don’t have to worry about today.

The year is 1993 – grunge music can be heard from every car stereo, Bill Clinton is inaugurated as the US president and there isn’t a smartphone in sight. However, 1993 is going to be an infamous year for the anthropology students of Bristol Falls College. You see, there is a killer on the loose terrorising everyone that has taken part in a group assignment arranged by anthropology teacher Kelly (his teaching style is quite informal, as he doesn’t appear to have a surname). The assignment in question involves sorting and arranging a box of bones into a human skeleton. However, once the assignment is complete, the students start to find more bones outside of the classroom, and once they do, it usually means the killer has a bone to pick with them. The students work together in disharmony to figure out who the killer is – knowing full well it could be one of them.

It’s clear that 213 Bones is trying to lean into the slashers of the 1990s. There are even little nods to Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer and Urban Legend, but it never quite hits the mark. All the relevant pieces are used: an array of school friends – there’s about 10 of them; a murder before the main credits – it’s good to get the numbers up early; and the obvious suspect and the suspect with the dark elusive past – all the usual suspects really – but none of these pieces seem to slot into place. Unfortunately, 213 Bones comes over as more of a spoof, especially when humour is used to relieve the suspense – the timing is off and it shows.

There appears to be a rush to introduce all the students in an assembly-line fashion as quickly as possible, and all the stereotypes are there: the bad-boy slacker who plays by his own rules, the token couple who get down to it in some fashion, the bookworm etc. Once these initial introductions take place, the gang are simply there to be killed off.

As well as the students, a few other potential suspects are introduced, but too many of them are obvious red herrings and generally consist of white men who are deemed suspicious by the fact they are socially awkward or generally unpleasant. There may be a high number of potential suspects, but not many credible ones. There’s no real sense of intrigue or suspense when the killer is finally revealed – you’re certainly not kicking yourself for not guessing correctly.   

The music score can be heard throughout, even scenes that don’t need any musical accompaniment have a low-level pitch to them, to the point where when music is used to punctuate something it doesn’t have the desired effect, it becomes white noise.

It should be said that the killer is effective and efficient. Victims don’t have much of a chance to escape and death is met pretty swiftly. There’s no real cat-and-mouse chases in this one. When the killer is finally revealed, it makes little sense and the priority appears to simply unveil someone that you didn’t expect to see. All the nuances of tying up all loose ends and showcasing all the small details that may have been overlooked or missed along the way simply aren’t there.

213 Bones tries to follow the formula – mainly from The Faculty - but falls short. Even though slasher films are generally formulaic - individual performances, scenes, deaths can add some originality to proceedings, but 213 Bones doesn’t really hyperextend that way. The end result is something rather flat and pedestrian. 

Movie Score: 2/5